I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
