I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
