she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
