thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection