Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Houston, we have a squirter
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
