You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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