He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
