"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
