I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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