So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
