When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
