Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
