I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
