That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
