I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
whose parrot is this?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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