I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
