i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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