I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you would pick up someone in the library
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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