sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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