Texts From Last Night

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I wannas sexs uuuuu

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  (616) I wannas sexs uuuuu http://tfl.nu/1vml
  Replies (7) Good night (1394) Bad night (554)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol

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  (309): nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol http://tfl.nu/jhs1
  Replies (54) Good night (1670) Bad night (3356)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.

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  (617): it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before. http://tfl.nu/1u0r
  Replies (20) Good night (621) Bad night (3732)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.

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  (775): For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven. http://tfl.nu/fqjc
  Replies (38) Good night (1357) Bad night (6679)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.

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  (847): so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all. http://tfl.nu/abug
  Replies (15) Good night (1187) Bad night (4210)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.

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  (313): I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays. http://tfl.nu/hsxj
  Replies (12) Good night (861) Bad night (3777)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.

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  (256): I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck. http://tfl.nu/xyly
  Replies (15) Good night (1022) Bad night (5251)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny

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  (580): She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny http://tfl.nu/sg6f
  Replies (12) Good night (1112) Bad night (3285)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.

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  (509): Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad. http://tfl.nu/dn7l
  Replies (11) Good night (2086) Bad night (1405)
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  (619): View more from California

  We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?

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  (619): We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!? http://tfl.nu/jmdl
  Replies (9) Good night (1427) Bad night (509)
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  (518): View more from New York

  My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.

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  (518): My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday. http://tfl.nu/tcvi
  Replies (5) Good night (1723) Bad night (533)
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  (818): View more from California

  WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD

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  (818): WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD http://tfl.nu/zdjc
  Replies (10) Good night (1112) Bad night (480)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.

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  (920): Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night. http://tfl.nu/js17
  Replies (6) Good night (1345) Bad night (460)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.

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  (781): Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios. http://tfl.nu/bgm6
  Replies (1) Good night (385) Bad night (206)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.

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  (516): So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two. http://tfl.nu/ti8k
  Replies (0) Good night (374) Bad night (259)

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