Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
