When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Your penis caused this!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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