At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
