he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
