You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize