we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
