scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
