You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
