i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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