"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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