just tell him i said nine months
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
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I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Pants are for mortals
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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