After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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