I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
