You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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