I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
