well I can't set my house on fire every night
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize
