It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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