i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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