You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
