after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
whose parrot is this?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
