what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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