You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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