you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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