I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
