At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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