Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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