sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
