her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
