Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize