This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
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I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I need to sanitize my soul.
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Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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