I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
